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How to Stay Connected When You Want Different Things From Your Wedding Ceremony

Charlie

Today I’m handing over to Joy Justice, founder of Rooted Ceremonies, to talk about how to stay connected when you want different things from your wedding ceremony.

This post is for those moments when wedding planning starts to feel less like joyful decision-making and more like “why are we arguing about this?”. It’s a gentle reminder that disagreement isn’t a sign you’re doing anything wrong. Written by a celebrant with a background in mediation, it explores what’s often sitting underneath those differences and offers ways to approach them with more curiosity, understanding and compassion.

Over to Joy from Rooted Ceremonies to tell us more…

This article was written by guest contributor Joy Justice of Rooted Ceremonies. Views and experiences shared are their own. With thanks to Maureen Du Preez for the beautiful photographs to accompany this post.

How to stay connected when you want different things from your wedding ceremony

It’s such a common thing to find yourself in disagreement with your partner about your wedding plans, because you are two different people with two different personalities, organising a really significant event where you are both going to be the centre of attention! You may also be feeling the pressure of meeting other people’s expectations or needs, and including their opinions. It can soon feel like a big stress and not what you believed it would feel like at all!

If this is your experience, I hear you! I would like to encourage you and share some tools with you. I write these from my experiences as a mediator and facilitator of difficult group dynamics, as well as a wedding celebrant. Working with a sensitive and attentive celebrant and/or wedding planner, is a great way of having some support to be held while you listen to one another and come back on the same page.

Now for the tools:

Trust and Disagreement

It is not a bad thing to disagree! When you are in a relationship that involves a high level of trust, you will probably find that you bounce around between disagreement and agreement on lots of topics- ranging from small things like sponges and cutlery drawers, to big things like raising children and life after death.

Perhaps you’ve observed that over time within your relationship, there are more things that you disagree on, compared to when you first got together. This is probably because your trust has grown over time, and you have learnt to show your truer selves and not be afraid that you’ll put one another off!

When it comes from a place of mutual trust, disagreement is a healthy thing because it indicates that you feel safe enough to express your true opinions and opens the doorway to explore what lies underneath- be that your core values, fears and insecurities, or prior experiences.

Charlie

How to Decide What’s Worth Spending Money on for Your Wedding (and What Isn’t)

Charlie

What’s Worth Spending Money on for Your Wedding?

One of the hardest parts of planning a wedding isn’t choosing colours, venues, or flowers, it’s deciding what actually deserves a place in your budget.

Because once you start looking at wedding advice online, you’ll quickly find that every element is presented as essential by someone. Photography is non-negotiable. Guests must be catered for properly. Stationery sets the tone. Flowers create atmosphere. Favours show appreciation. Videography captures memories forever.

And suddenly, what began as a meaningful celebration starts to feel like a long list of things you’re supposed to justify not having.

In my previous posts in this mini series, Sustainable Wedding Planning Doesn’t Have to Feel Overwhelming and What Actually Makes the Biggest Impact in a Sustainable Wedding? we explored how to start wedding planning from a place of clarity, and how to work out which choices actually have the greatest environmental.

The final important step is ensuring you know where to spend your budget. If you’re trying to plan a wedding that feels thoughtful, guided by what matters most to you, or environmentally conscious, this pressure can feel even heavier, because you’re not only thinking about money, but also about impact, intention, and whether each choice really reflects who you are.

The truth is, there isn’t a universal list of what’s “worth it”.

But there is a gentler way to decide.

Start with what the day is really for

Before looking at numbers, suppliers, or spreadsheets, it helps to pause and ask a quieter question:

What do we want this day to feel like, and what is it truly for?

→ Not what weddings normally look like.
→ Not what guests expect.
→ Not what social media celebrates.

Just yours.

For some couples, the answer centres on gathering everyone they love in one place. For others, it’s about creating a calm, intimate moment that feels deeply personal. For some, food is the heart of the celebration; and for others, it’s music, conversation, or simply the chance to mark the commitment in a meaningful way.

When you begin here, spending decisions stop being about whether something is “expected” and start becoming about whether it supports the experience you actually want to create.

Charlie

What Actually Makes the Biggest Impact in a Sustainable Wedding?

Charlie

What makes the biggest impact in your sustainable wedding?

If you’ve been exploring how to plan a sustainable wedding, you may already have realised something slightly uncomfortable:

There are a lot of opinions about what makes a wedding eco-friendly.

Reusable décor.
Plantable invitations.
Dried flowers.
Vintage tableware.
Biodegradable confetti.

All lovely ideas and all potentially thoughtful choices.

But when everything is presented as equally important, it becomes almost impossible to know where your energy — or your budget — will genuinely make the biggest difference.

In my previous post, Sustainable Wedding Planning Doesn’t Have to Feel Overwhelming, I talked about starting wedding planning from a place of clarity rather than rushing into decisions. This is the natural next step: once you’ve begun thinking about what matters to you, how do you work out which choices actually have the greatest environmental and practical impact?

Because the truth is, not all wedding decisions carry the same weight.

→ Some shape the entire footprint of the day.
→ Others are small details that are nice to consider, but unlikely to change the overall impact very much.

Knowing the difference can take a huge amount of pressure off.

The biggest impacts usually come from the biggest structures

When people search for sustainable wedding ideas, the focus often lands on visible details — decorations, favours, stationery, styling touches.

But in reality, the largest impacts tend to come from the foundational choices that shape the whole event.

Not the finishing touches, but the framework underneath.

These are the areas that quietly influence travel, waste, energy use, and overall consumption — often without being the most photogenic or widely discussed.

Charlie

Sustainable Wedding Planning Doesn’t Have to Feel Overwhelming – A Calmer Way to Begin

Charlie

A calmer way to begin sustainable wedding planning

There’s a quiet moment at the start of wedding planning that doesn’t get talked about very much.

It’s the moment after the excitement.
After the congratulations.
After the first flurry of ideas.

When you realise you now have to actually plan a wedding, and suddenly you’re faced with thousands of decisions, opinions, traditions, expectations, and costs, all arriving at once.

If you’re hoping to plan a sustainable wedding, or simply an eco-friendly wedding that feels thoughtful and intentional, this moment can feel even heavier. Because now it’s not only about logistics. It’s also about impact. Values. Meaning. Responsibility. And trying to work out how all of that fits into one single day.

It can feel like you should already know where to start, but most couples don’t.

And in my experience, the problem isn’t that couples lack ideas or motivation, it’s that the wedding world tends to push you straight into decisions before you’ve had space to think about what really matters to you.

The pressure to decide before you’re ready

Wedding planning advice often begins with action:

Book the venue.
Choose a date.
Set the budget.
Start the guest list.

All practical steps, and all important eventually.

But when these decisions happen before you’ve had time to reflect on what kind of wedding actually feels right for you, they can quietly lock you into a version of the day that’s shaped more by habit or expectation than intention.

This is often where overwhelm begins, not because weddings are inherently complicated, but because the order of decisions feels back to front. (At least it feels that way to me!)

Instead of starting with suppliers and spreadsheets, sustainable wedding planning usually feels calmer when it starts somewhere softer:

With clarity. That is, a really clear understanding of what matters most to you.

Charlie

The Truth About Valentine’s Flowers: What’s Really in Season in the UK?

Charlie

Valentine’s Day and red roses go hand in hand – or at least, that’s what we’ve been told. But if you’re looking for flowers that are actually in season in the UK in February, the classic bouquet of red roses just isn’t it.

Most supermarket and high street bouquets come from far-flung places like Kenya and South America, clocking up huge air miles before they even land in your hands.

So, what should a seasonal Valentine’s bouquet look like? And what are the best options if you want flowers that are both beautiful and genuinely sustainable? I asked British flower farmers and florists from across the UK to share their thoughts – and their alternatives to imported blooms.

Charlie

Wedding ‘To Feel’ List For More Connection + A Freebie For You

Charlie

With the start of the New Year and many new engaged couples following the holiday break, there are wedding ‘to do’ lists popping up all over social media and blogs. While a ‘to do’ list is super helpful, I think it’s important to recognise they can also be overwhelming and rush you into planning.

In my opinion, a wedding ‘to do’ list shouldn’t overshadow and come before connecting to what your values are as a couple, and what you want your wedding day and wedding planning to feel like.

In order to help you in a practical way with this, I’ve pulled together my wedding ‘to feel’ list. A list of 10 ways to feel as you plan your wedding, to guide how you want to feel on your wedding day.

So for just a moment, let’s put aside your wedding ‘to do’ list and spreadsheets, and connect with your feelings about this wedding your dreaming up.

Your Wedding ‘To Feel’ List

Connected to each other throughout the process.

True to the values that matter most to us.

Confident in the choices we’ve made together.

Authentic to who we are as a couple.

Positive about how we’ve spent our money with intention.

Empowered to say yes to what feels right and no to what doesn’t.

Proud of how we’ve navigated challenges together.

Supported by the people we love.

Excited about the day we’ve created together.

Grounded in the love and commitment we’re celebrating.

Charlie

Late Summer Sustainable Wedding Shoot with Autumn Leaf and Seedhead Curtain Ceremony Backdrop

Charlie

Late summer sustainable wedding inspiration

If you’re thinking of end of summer – early autumn as the time of year you’d like to get married, this beautiful late summer sustainable wedding shoot is full of inspiration to get you started.

A great team of local (to Essex) wedding suppliers, all with a passion to run their businesses more sustainably, got together to inspire couples with their creativity, skills and offerings. Set at Barnfield wedding venue in the Essex countryside, the shoot showcases stunning seasonal florals, a spectacular ceremony backdrop, eco wedding dresses, plantable stationery, a sand ceremony, and more.

You’ll find a full list of suppliers and links at the bottom of the feature, as well as a photo gallery.

Emily Brown Photography and Celebrant Kate are both Recommended Suppliers of The Natural Wedding Company directory.

Charlie

Seasonal British Winter Wedding Flowers: an inspirational guide and galleries

Charlie

It’s British Flowers Week 2024 and I am hoping to inspire you throughout this week to choose seasonal British flowers for your wedding – whatever the season (yes, even Winter!).

So far I’ve featured:

**Seasonal British Spring Wedding Flowers**

Today I’ll be showcasing the best of British flowers for a Winter Wedding. For the purpose of this feature, Winter is considered December, January and Febraury.

All of the wedding bouquets and floral arrangements you see created from British flowers.

Winter in the UK might seem like a tricky time of year for a beautiful wedding bouquet of British grown flowers, but I hope this post will show you its not! You just need to expand your notion of what makes a wedding bouquet a wedding bouquet (tip: it doesn’t mean roses, peonies and dahlias).

So be inspired by this variety of seasonal British winter wedding flowers – from bouquets and buttonholes of exquisite dried flowers, grasses and seedheads, to lush winter bouquets featuring hellebores, anemones, early blossoms and interesting foliage and berries.

Don’t forget to check out the Wedding Flowers category of our eco wedding directory to find our recommended suppliers.

And if you’re still figuring out what flowers are actually in season for your wedding date, I’ve put together a free guide to Sustainable Seasonal Wedding Flowers for Every Season. It walks you through the best options for spring, summer, autumn and winter, so you can plan with more confidence and less guesswork. You can download it here.

Why should you choose seasonal British winter wedding flowers?

Most simply put – they are the most sustainable option for wedding flowers. Flowers from the Farm list 6 reasons to buy British flowers (you can read all the info here), which in short are:

Tread lightly on the planet – flowers are grown mainly outdoors without need for additional light and heat; no chemicals needed to extend the flowers life once cut; and the flower farmers care and enrich the soil and land they grow on.
Reduce flower miles – flowers grown in the UK travel much shorter distances than those coming from abroad by boat or plane, some coming from as far as South America, Africa and Asia.
Character and charm – British flower farmers grow small quantities of lots of different varieties, and sometimes that aren’t uniformly straight, but this gives interest and uniqueness to the arrangements they create.
Buy local – support your local economy and community!
Bring the outdoors in – seasonal flowers really capture a moment in the British seasonal year and for a wedding I think that’s pretty special.
Because you’re a flower lover – this is about a love for flowers that look AND smell divine, something you will struggle to find in the commercial flower supply chain.

Important things to remember about seasonal British winter wedding flowers

Each of the bouquets and arrangements featured comes from a flower farmer or florist from all over the UK. It’s important to remember that different places will have different flowers available in season – what’s growing in Cornwall in summer will be different to what’s growing in Scotland.

There are also seasonal variations year to year depending on the weather. When choosing British flowers you need to release some of your expectations and be open to going with whatever is blooming best when you get married.

Do take that into consideration when viewing the images. The best thing you can do is find a florist or flower farmer local to where you’re getting married and find out what might be blooming in Winter.

Charlie

Seasonal British Autumn Wedding Flowers: an inspirational guide and galleries

Charlie

It’s British Flowers Week 2024 and I am hoping to inspire you throughout this week to choose seasonal British flowers for your wedding – whatever the season (yes, even Winter!).

So far I’ve featured Seasonal British Spring Wedding Flowers and Seasonal British Summer Wedding Flowers, and today I’ll be showcasing the best of British flowers for an Autumn Wedding. For the purpose of this feature, Autumn is considered September, October and November.

All of the wedding bouquets and floral arrangements you see created from British flowers.

Autumn is a beautiful time of year for British grown wedding flowers – there’s still ample choice of interesting flowers, plus there’s lots of vibrant leaves and foliage, plus grasses, berries and seedheads.

Don’t forget to check out the Wedding Flowers category of our eco wedding directory to find our recommended suppliers.

Why should you choose seasonal British autumn wedding flowers?

Most simply put – they are the most sustainable option for wedding flowers. Flowers from the Farm list 6 reasons to buy British flowers (you can read all the info here), which in short are:

Tread lightly on the planet – flowers are grown mainly outdoors without need for additional light and heat; no chemicals needed to extend the flowers life once cut; and the flower farmers care and enrich the soil and land they grow on.
Reduce flower miles – flowers grown in the UK travel much shorter distances than those coming from abroad by boat or plane, some coming from as far as South America, Africa and Asia.
Character and charm – British flower farmers grow small quantities of lots of different varieties, and sometimes that aren’t uniformly straight, but this gives interest and uniqueness to the arrangements they create.
Buy local – support your local economy and community!
Bring the outdoors in – seasonal flowers really capture a moment in the British seasonal year and for a wedding I think that’s pretty special.
Because you’re a flower lover – this is about a love for flowers that look AND smell divine, something you will struggle to find in the commercial flower supply chain.

Important things to remember about seasonal British autumn wedding flowers

Charlie

Seasonal British Summer Wedding Flowers: an inspirational guide and galleries

Charlie

Choose seasonal British flowers for your Summer Wedding

It’s British Flowers Week 2024 and I am hoping to inspire you throughout this week to choose seasonal British flowers for your wedding – whatever the season (yes, even Winter!).

Yesterday I featured Seasonal British Spring Wedding Flowers, and today I’ll be showcasing the best of British flowers for a Summer Wedding. For the purpose of this feature, Summer is consider June, July and August.

All of the wedding bouquets and floral arrangements you see created from British flowers. They come in all shades of colour, and lots of different styles. There’s loads of choice of blooms, plus beautiful grasses and foliage.

Don’t forget to check out the Wedding Flowers category of our eco wedding directory to find our recommended suppliers.

Why should you choose seasonal British summer wedding flowers?

Most simply put – they are the most sustainable option for wedding flowers. Flowers from the Farm list 6 reasons to buy British flowers (you can read all the info here), which in short are:

Tread lightly on the planet – flowers are grown mainly outdoors without need for additional light and heat; no chemicals needed to extend the flowers life once cut; and the flower farmers care and enrich the soil and land they grow on.
Reduce flower miles – flowers grown in the UK travel much shorter distances than those coming from abroad by boat or plane, some coming from as far as South America, Africa and Asia.
Character and charm – British flower farmers grow small quantities of lots of different varieties, and sometimes that aren’t uniformly straight, but this gives interest and uniqueness to the arrangements they create.
Buy local – support your local economy and community!
Bring the outdoors in – seasonal flowers really capture a moment in the British seasonal year and for a wedding I think that’s pretty special.
Because you’re a flower lover – this is about a love for flowers that look AND smell divine, something you will struggle to find in the commercial flower supply chain.

Important things to remember about seasonal British summer wedding flowers

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