Our friend and TNWC recommended photographer Maureen du Preez has a wonderful way with words. She is writing about wedding issues that we think are really important – not just what flowers to choose, or how to do your hair.
When looking for your wedding dress, have you prioritised how easily you can move in it? We’re not talking about just how well you can walk down the aisle, but truly move in it. Can you dance all night in it, be hugged all day, and eat all the good food? Is it a wedding dress you can wander through a forest in or hike across the moors in. Can you even get muddy in it?
If I haven’t already convinced you to think more about this, perhaps Maureen du Preez’s beautifully written words will.
Why You Should Choose A Wedding Dress You Can Move In
Wear a wedding dress you can move in. You can love in. A gown that makes you feel like a queen who can dance all night until your bones ache, and be held tight by your loved ones all day long.
A dress you can climb hills in, explore forests, to reach that special place you long your love to be captured. Where the magical light spills in, and the trees canopy around.
The wedding industry can be full of information on what you need for you wedding, “must haves”, “can’t do without’s” and all manner of people telling you that your wedding day just won’t be a wedding if you don’t buy this that and what-have-you. Don’t get me wrong, I like to buy nice things as much as anyone else, but I often find myself feeling rather suffocated in this social media world that can make you feel like you just need to have so much stuff.
When I come across articles like this one, written by TNWC photographer Maureen du Preez, it feels like a big gush of fresh air that reminds me of what I want to share, to champion, to encourage when it comes to weddings.
With kind permission I am sharing this beautifully written piece on Why You Should Have An Unplugged Wedding Ceremony, originally shared on Maureen du Preez’s blog. Included in this article are photographs from beautiful ‘unplugged weddings’.
Why You Should Have An Unplugged Wedding Ceremony
An Open Letter to the Permanently Plugged.
I never really got this modern desire to photograph every single thing happening in front of me, which you may find strange coming from a photographer… I often just get so caught up in the moment that I don’t even think about grabbing my phone/camera from my bag. I prefer to enjoy the moment as it unfolds, without distractions, as it won’t happen again. After attending many weddings over the years I realise I’m in the minority though.
It’s during moments like the ceremony that I’m sometimes astounded at the amount of people all wielding phones, ipads etc, all desperately trying to take the same photo. Some of them stepping out into the aisle, blocking the professional photographer (and more importantly the groom’s!) view of the bride entering. Some of them ruining the pro’s capture by using their DSLR’s pop up flash.. A moment that can not be repeated now lost.
I came across the most heartfelt post from a wedding photographer to her brides-to-be, which sends such an important message that I think many women need to hear ahead of their wedding day. Written by Julie Anne Images, one of our TNWC Recommended Suppliers, this letter of sorts is entitled “Dear Bride-to-be, please stop hating photos of yourself.”
As I share this, I am acutely aware that I am still one of those women who like to check photos on the camera when my husband has taken them, or cringe and want to untag myself from Facebook photos shared by friends. I am still learning, dear friends, to relinquish this urge, not only for myself but now because I have a daughter of my own. I don’t want her to grow up with these insecurities, and so I think must first be kind to ourselves (easier said than done I know).
Wedding day appearance anxieties
I must say, the one day where I really felt free of any of those feelings was my own wedding day. Both my husband and I do not like being the centre of attention and I was filled with horror at the idea of having cameras pointed at us all day. But when it came to the day itself, I didn’t think about it one bit, I let the pure happiness of the day wash over me and I never once thought about how my hair looked or whether someone was capturing ‘bad’ pictures of me. I hope if you too have anxieties about being photographed on your wedding day, that you can feel as free as I did.
With kind permission we are sharing Julie Anne’s message with you all. Over to Julie…
Dear Bride-to-be, please stop hating pictures of yourself
…I’m the same, and I think I’ve worked it out. So often, we don’t enjoy looking at photos of ourselves because we’re used to getting ready in front of a mirror. Here’s the science bit: Our faces aren’t symmetrical and when we see them flipped as a mirror-image in a photograph, it takes us by surprise. Not to mention the fact that we each have either a left or right dominant eye for vision – add this into the mix with an asymmetrical face seen the other-way-round from the view we’re used to in the mirror, and it’s no wonder we often take a dislike to our appearance in a photograph.
And so we find ways to curate what we look like. We take selfies slightly from above so our eyes look bigger and our chins disappear – and how any mirror selfies do you see, posted publicly because as a reflected image those are the features, the view, the wielder of the phone-camera is used to? We’re not familiar with the full-length or side-on perspective. We criticise the aspects of our looks that in themselves are the very family resemblances that the gene pool passed on from those we love (I have my dad’s earlobes, my mum’s freckles and build, and I never got my teeth fixed…).